Free · five minutes

How ready are the two of you, really?

Most couples arrive at their wedding having talked through some of it and quietly assumed the rest. This is a straightforward way to find out which is which — before it matters.

Start the scorecard

No sign-up to begin. Nothing is shared with anyone.

What this is

A conversation starter, not a verdict

It was built out of the questions that come up again and again in premarital counselling — the ones couples are glad to have found before the wedding rather than after.

Thirty-four short questions

Multiple choice, one at a time. About five minutes. There are no right answers and nothing is graded.

A picture of six areas

Where the two of you have already done the talking, and where the conversation has not happened yet.

Something to do about it

A free guide matched to whichever area came out lowest, and the option to send it to your partner so you can compare.

What it covers

Six areas, four questions each

The same six a premarital counselling course works through — which is not a coincidence.

  1. 01

    Foundation & Commitment

    The shared picture of the life you are building, and what commitment means when it costs something.

  2. 02

    Communication

    How easily the difficult things get said, and how well they land when they do.

  3. 03

    Roles & Expectations

    Who does what, whose career moves, and how money is actually held between you.

  4. 04

    Family Patterns

    What each of you learnt about marriage at home, and how much of it you mean to keep.

  5. 05

    Conflict & Repair

    What happens in the first ten minutes of an argument, and how the two of you find each other again afterwards.

  6. 06

    Practical & Legal Readiness

    The marital regime, the debts, the wills and the first-year logistics.

The interesting part

Do it separately. Then compare.

When you finish, you can send it to your partner. Once you have both done it, you get a page showing the two side by side — and, more usefully, where the two of you see things most differently.

That gap is almost always the conversation worth having. They see your scores for the six areas and nothing else — not your email address, and not your individual answers.

Start the scorecard

This scorecard is a reflective tool for engaged and committed couples. It is not a psychological assessment, a diagnosis, or a predictor of marital outcome.

It was put together by Sumarie Engelbrecht, an HPCSA-registered counsellor. If you would rather talk to someone than fill anything in, the premarital counselling page explains how that works, and the first session is free.